How I scram.

I woke up this morning and upon entering the bathroom, I noticed that the waterline was a wee higher than usual. I flushed, and that's when I quickly realized that there was a problem. After calling the property manager's emergency pager, bailing out the water and um...stuff...I spent the morning keeping the cats out of the bathroom, checking to make sure the water was shut off, and fighting the urge to purge. Once the guy came to fix it (and he was happy to, as he gets time and a half today)and I finished bleaching and sandblasting the toilet area with Comet, I looked at the clock. Less than one hour until game time.

A while back (during MoFo, I believe), some bloggers were sharing their tofu scramble secrets. I never got around to it, since I was trying NEW things. You know, like taking pictures of my refrigerator.

Anyhoo, here's how I do it. Sauté some chopped mushrooms and a little onion in olive oil. Crumble in some extra firm tofu. Add minced garlic, dried thyme, a little Kala Namak (if you're into an eggy taste), whatever other seasonings you like (the Southwest Seasoning from Penzey's is awesome), and some nooch.* Add a little water and cook for a few minutes. Stir in some fresh chard. I like the Chard of Many Colors from Trader Joe's, because it's so pretty. Add the juice of half a lemon (or one small one), and stir until the scramble is cooked and the chard is wilted. Sprinkle with toasted sunflower seeds.

You are now ready for kickoff.



* I don't measure this stuff. Just use as much as you deem necessary. Just remember to add a little water if you like a lotta nooch in your scram.

A belated Weihnachtsgrüße!

For Christmas this year, I went with a German dish. The half of the family I was with is the German-Norwegian side, and all things sausage and beer are most appreciated.

My mom made this once. All I remember is that she called it "Auflauf." Turns out, all that means is "to come together." The dish itself was a variation on Schaefer or Wagners Auflauf, and my mom made it all her own. It's supposed to be like a shepherd's pie; knackwurst, sauerkraut, and topped with mashed potatoes and baked. My mom made it with a layer of scalloped potatoes, sauerkraut, wurst, and a topping of gouda cheese. I wasn't completely into the idea of making vegan sausage as well as taking a risk with the Gooda Uncheese, so I made it the easiest, and most traditional way.

I started with Isa's spicy pinto bean sausage recipe, but left out all the spices and soy sauce in her recipe, and instead used about a teaspoon of sea salt, cumin, ground coriander, and half a teaspoon of nutmeg. Then a generous dose of pepper (white pepper would be much better, but I am all out), and nooch. Kneaded it with my hands, rolled up in foil and steamed until I forgot and the smoke detector went off.

Here are my sliced knackwursts in my Brand New Le Creuset.



I made mashed potatoes, using grapeseed oil, unsweetened soy milk, salt, and a little nooch. Use red potatoes, and leave the skins on. You want it to be spreadable, so a little more milk than usual helps. The sauerkraut was from a can, although I prefer the Eden Organic in the jar. It was what they had at Target, which is where I came up with the idea. I heated it up in a small saucepan with a tablespoon of maple syrup and a tablespoon or so of caraway seed. Spread it evenly over the knackwurst slices.



Then the potatoes.



Bake for 30 or so minutes at 400° until the top looks nice and golden. Let sit for 15 minutes, and serve in slices. Wash down with a good German beer with family and friends. Don't tell them it's vegan until the dish is picked clean.

Quick explanation

It's been a rough few weeks.

First, I make a mistake at work that is basically my third strike. I begin jobhunting in earnest. I interview for a warehouse data entry position. She loves me. I am still sending out resumes.

Second, my computer died. Finished. The power supply went to shit and I was given a bad prognosis.

Third, I quit my job at the bank. Just quit. No notice. I was offered the warehouse job on Sunday, and quit on Monday. I worked a little that day, so I can stock up on prescriptions before my health insurance runs out. The last thing I need when starting a new job is to be fertile and crazy.

Fourth, started the new job. It starts at 6:30am and I'm off at 3. Still getting used to leaving in the dark and coming home in the sunlight.

Fifth, I got a new computer. I have zero dollars in my account, so my BFF Ed fronted for it.

Sixth, I am brokedy broke. I am waiting on my last check from the bank, which pretty much all goes toward advances. My check from the new job doesn't come until the 19th. Seriously. This is why I haven't blogged. I can only take so many pictures of elbow macaroni with tomato sauce or beans and rice. Oh, and I just plain forgot about taking pictures on Thanksgiving.

Once the money starts flowing again, and my life starts to feel normal, I will be back with plenty of tasty treats. Maybe as soon as this weekend!

Back to the kitchen.

Okay, my guy won the presidency, I'm healthy, I have time. It's time to get back to being creative.

I was thinking about burgers. When I ate meat, I was pretty good at making them. Fairly easy; some meat, onion, garlic, a little bit of breadcrumb, some steak sauce, and there you go. So why have I been so intimidated about making my own veggie ones? I used to buy the Boca ones a lot, but they started to taste a leeetle too much like mystery meat to me, and I wanted to come up with something that was hearty and delicious, but still quite obviously vegan. I'm all for my vegan cheesecakes, ice cream, scrambles, and sour cream tasting just like the animal product counterpart, but as far as meat is concerned, the less it tastes like the real thing, the better. 'Cept for sausage-y things, because it's all spices to begin with, anyway.

Don't you hate it when you come up with a great idea, only to find out it's been done? Every time I do this, I try to make it just a little different, so it can be uniquely mine. I found a million recipes for sweet potato lentil burgers on the interwebs, and they all resembled each other. Quinoa, cumin, blah blah. I made mine to be a little more substantial. They remind me of a falafel, but with a softer and sweeter taste.




Sambhar Garnet Yam Lentil Burgers
makes 12 big patties

1 cup rinsed brown lentils
1 chopped onion
salt and pepper to taste
1 huge or 2 medium garnet yams, peeled and cut into 1" chunks
1 large carrot, peeled and chopped
1 cup broth
1/2 cup vital wheat gluten
2/3 cups quick-cooking oats
1 tbsp tamarind concentrate
2 tsp curry powder
2 tbsp sambhar powder

Preheat oven to 375°

In a large pot, bring two cups of water to a boil. Do not salt; it makes the lentils hard. Add lentils. Bring back to a boil, then turn to low and simmer. Add onion. Simmer lentils for 20-40 minutes (it depends on how old your lentils are, so just keep checking). Meanwhile, steam your yams and carrot. Mash, and season to taste with salt and pepper. Stir in a little broth, then add the gluten. Mix well until it toughens up a little; adding broth if you need to. When lentils are cooked, drain off any liquid, and add to the yam mixture. Mix, mix, mix. Stir in oats, tamarind, curry, and sambhar. Mix. Let it cool, and then form into patties. The stuff should be kind of sticky, so keep the water running. Put patties on a baking sheet coated with canola spray. Bake for 15 minutes. Flip, bake another 15. They should be golden brown. Serve in pitas with a yogurt-cilantro sauce.

President Obama.

VeganMoFo is over!

I worked a measly five hours today, and still came home and did a Homer dive into my bed. I was awakened three hours later to Bowie biting my fingers (this means "Feed me"), and the computer sitting here just mocking me.

The seeds and the cookies were a hit. I still have a Rubbermaid container of pumpkin in the fridge. So, why am I not in the kitchen, whipping up some soup, or bread, or something else? Because I can't do it. I can't even open up the container because the smell will make me cry.

So, I decided to answer some questions that have appeared in the comments this month.

What kind of morons don't want cupcakes!?
I know, right?

mmm... so this is silly (I guess I've always had a vague idea of how to make vegetable stock... I mean really how else would you do it?) but 'WOW' so easy... think I might have a weekend activity... are there certain scraps that I really need to have to make it taste right?
I answered this in the comments, but who goes back to check? Anyway, whatever scraps you want will work, although I would steer clear of cruciferous vegetables like broccoli, cauliflower, and cabbage. You don't want your broth to taste like feet. I recently used grapefruit rind in a batch, and it added something to it that I can't really describe, but I'd do it again!

And do you have sriracha?
I had to talk myself out of buying the 32oz. bottle.

(Re: paella) Does this one have saffron? (it's too expensive for me to buy and then not like!)
It's just not paella without saffron! For some reason I have a lot of it. I know it's expensive, but maybe your co-op or HFS has it in bulk? Just buy enough for a recipe?

Where does one find vegan fish sauce?
1/2 cup soy sauce
2 garlic cloves, minced
1/2 tsp hot red pepper flakes
1 Tbsp fresh lemon juice
1 Tbsp sugar or natural sweetener
1/4 cup water

You're gonna hate me. I have never made Cookies and I don't buy Chocolate Chips!
Why?
I don't hate you. I admire your restraint. Just say no.

Does barack obama like sweet potato pie?


Only one bite of sweet potato pie?
Well, I did bring it for my coworkers.

Wait...what exactly is the difference between dressing and stuffing?
Stuffing is stuffed. Dressing is on the side.

Where's your sage bread recipe from?
One of many bread machine cookbooks. I think I got it from "The Best Low-Fat, No-Sugar Bread Machine Cookbook Ever." Look for "Stuffing Bread." And if you don't have a bread machine, get one. Purist, schmurist.



Happy Halloween!

Devil's Night

Today at my job, my boss carved our pumpkin to enter in the district carving contest. Instead of my suggestion that we do a Barack O'Lantern, we settled on something work related. I know, right? LAME.

Anyway, I was given the guts to de-seed. I spent my afternoon in the drive-up with slimy hands, removing seeds from stringy pumpkin guts, and helping customers. One thing I did notice: pumpkin makes your hands feel really smooth. I think I might make a face mask out of that stuff someday. Someday when I don't hate pumpkins anymore.




Tonight, between fighting with my family about politics via email and talking on the phone, I whipped up a batch of tamari-chile oil roasted pumpkin seeds (firey!), and pumpkin chocolate chip cookies. The seeds were mine, and the cookie recipe is from the intertubes. I think I will doctor it up so the cookies are less cakey and more chewy and gooey next time. How come my cookies always come out cakey? Is it the baking powder? And since I made two things today, can I skip tomorrow? No? I hate you.



Tomorrow is the last day of MoFo. Will I make it? Stay tuned.